本帖最后由 ヮ成熟、羙° 于 2014-2-5 09:12 编辑
致儿子的一封信
荷叶/译
亲爱的塞思：
你只有三岁，此时此刻还不识字，更不必说去理解我在这封信里要告诫你的道理了。但我对以下三方面思之已久：关于你将要面对的生活，关于我到目前为止从生活中所悟出的道理和作为一个父亲，我必须履行的角色，即尽可能地让你为面对将来生活的考验做好准备。 今天你还不可能理解这封信，但当将来某一天，时机成熟时，我希望你能从我与你分享的道理中领会到些许智慧和价值。 你还小，生命尚未向你征收通行费，在你的道路上设置失望、伤心、孤独和痛苦。你还没有因长时间做费力不讨好的工作，以及日常生活中的投石和箭镞而疲惫不堪。 你要对此心存感激。你正处在人生的一个美好阶段，你的生命中还会出现许多美好时段，但要付出代价，经历风险。 我希望把我尝到的最有价值的东西与你分享，这会对你的人生有所帮助。至于我的建议，你则不可全信。因为适合我的东西不一定适合你。 生活有时会很残酷。 你的生活中可能会有些不友好的人。他们会因你的与众不同或者无缘无故地取笑你。他们也可能有意欺负你或伤害你。 对于这些人，你别无选择，只能学会应对他们，同时还要学会择友，要选择那些对你好，真的在乎你，并使你感觉良好的人作朋友。当你找到这样的朋友时，要把握住他们，珍视他们，与他们共度美好时光，对他们好，真心地爱他们。 你有时会遇到失望而不是成功。生活并不总能如你所愿。这是你需要学会应对的另一方面。不要让这些将你击倒，要继续前进。要接受失望，学会坚持，追梦就要不顾风险。学会化消极为积极，你会在生活中表现得更精彩。 你也将会面临被所爱的人抛弃而心碎欲绝。我希望这种情况你无须面对太多，但这种事时有发生。同样，你对此无能为力，只能疗伤，继续你的生活。让这些痛苦成为你生活中美好事物的垫脚石，学会利用这些让自己变得更强大。 不管怎样，对生活要坦诚。 是的，你的人生旅途中会有些残酷，会有些痛苦……但不要让这些使你拒绝接受新鲜事物。不要逃避生活，不要躲藏起来，不要把自己封闭起来。敞开心扉去接受新鲜事物，体验新的经历，接触新的人。你可能心碎十次，但在第十一次你会找到最精彩的女人。如果你关上心门，你就会错过那个女人，错过你生命中最美妙的时光。 你可能被你遇到的人所取笑、欺负或伤害……但遇到许多傻瓜后，你会找到一个真正的朋友。如果你封闭自己，不再对新人敞开心扉，你会避免痛苦……但同时也会错失遇到一些最好的人，他们会在你人生最艰难的时刻出现，与你一起开创你生命中最美好的时光。 你将失败很多次，但如果你被失败打倒，不再努力的话，你将错失当你取得新成就，达到新高度时的那种绝妙的成就感。失败是成功的垫脚石。 生活不是一场竞赛。 在学校里，在工作中，你会遇到许多想超过你的人。他们试图拥有更好的车子，更大的房子，更漂亮的衣服，更精妙的小玩艺儿。对于他们来说，生活是一场竞争，只有比同辈做得好，他们才开心。 这里有一个秘诀，生命不是一场竞赛，而是一次旅行。如果你把这次旅行用于讨好别人，超过别人，你在浪费自己的生命。相反，我们要学会享受生命，使之成为幸福之旅，爱之旅，不断学习不断提高之旅。 不要操心去拥有华车丽服或任何物质上的东西，甚至不要垂涎一份工资更高的工作。所有这些都无关紧要，所有这一切都不会使你更幸福。你只会得陇望蜀。相反，要学会知足常乐。用你挣钱买这些东西所浪费掉的时间，做些你爱做的事情。 找到你的激情所在，坚持不懈地去追求。不要安于一份仅能支付账单的工作。生命如此短暂，不能浪费在你讨厌的工作上。 爱应该是你的人生准则。 如果有一个词可以指导你的生活的话，这个词就应该是爱。我知道，这听起来有点老套，但相信我，没有更好的人生准则了。 有些人把成功当作人生准则，他们的生活将会压力重重，不开心且很肤浅。 有些人以自私为准则，把自己的需要置于别人的需要之上。他们会孤独一生，也不会开心。还有些人以正义为准则，试图展示正确的道路，劝说那些不以此为准则的人，但却以消极的方式，最终只剩下正义与他们为伍，而正义是个可怕的伙伴。 以爱为人生准则。全身心地爱配偶，爱孩子，爱父母，爱朋友。给予他们所需要的一切，除了爱不要向他们流露任何诸如残忍、不满、冷漠或失望等消极情绪。向他们敞开自己的心扉。 不仅要爱你的亲人，还要爱你的邻居，爱你的同事，爱陌生人，爱广义上的兄弟姐妹。给你遇到的任何一个人提供帮助，给他们一个微笑，一句善意的话，和一个友善的手势。 不仅要爱自己的邻人，爱陌生人，还要爱自己的敌人，爱那个曾经对你不友善，对你最残忍的人。爱他，因为他的灵魂饱受折磨，他最需要你的爱。 最重要的，要爱自己。尽管别人可能批评你，要学会别对自己太苛刻，不要认为自己丑陋、麻木和不配得到爱。相反，要相信自己是个很精彩的人，值得得到幸福和爱，学会爱现在的自己。 最后，要知道我爱你并且会永远爱你。你正在开始一次奇异的，令人提心吊胆，险象环生的，但最终肯定是精彩奇妙的旅行，我会尽可能地陪在你身边，一路顺风。 爱你的爸爸 附：原文 A Letter to My Son Dear Seth,
You’re only three years old, and at this point in your life you can't read,much less understand what I’m going to try to tell you in this letter. But I've been thinking a lot about the life that you have ahead of you, about my life sofar as I reflect on what I've learned, and about my role as a dad in trying to prepare you for the trials that you will face in the coming years.
You won't be ableto understand this letter today, but some day, when you're ready, I hope you will find some wisdom and value in what I share with you. You are young, and life has yet to take its toll on you, to throw disappointments and heartaches and loneliness and struggles and pain into your path. You have not been worn down yet by long hours of thankless work, by the slings and arrows of everyday life. For this, be thankful. You are at a wonderful stage of life. You have many wonderful stages of life still to come, but they are not without their costs and perils. I hope to help you along your path by sharing some of the best of what I've learned. As with any advice, take it with a grain of salt. What works for me might not work for you. Life Can Be Cruel There will be people in your life who won't be very nice. They'll tease you because you're different, or for no good reason. They might try to bully you or hurt you. There's not much you can do about these people except to learn to deal with them, and learn to choose friends who are kind to you, who actually care about you, who make you feel good about yourself. When you find friends like this, hold on to them,treasure them, spend time with them, be kind to them, love them. There will be times when you are met with disappointment instead of success. Life won't always turn out the way you want. This is just another thing you'll have to learn to deal with. But instead of letting these things get you down, push on.Accept disappointment and learn to persevere, to pursue your dreams despite pitfalls. Learn to turn negatives into positives, and you'll do much better in life. You will also face heartbreak and abandonment by those you love. I hope you don't have to face this too much, but it happens. Again, not much you can do but to heal, and to move on with your life. Let these pains become stepping stones to better things in life, and learn to use them to make you stronger. But Be Open to life Anyway Yes, you'll find cruelty and suffering in your journey through life … but don't let that close you to new things. Don't retreat from life, don't hide or wall yourself off. Be open to new things, new experiences, new people. You might get your heart broken 10 times, but find the most wonderful woman the 11th time. If you shut yourself off from love, you'll miss out on that woman, and the happiest times of your life. You might gett eased and bullied and hurt by people you meet … and then after meeting dozens of jerks, find a true friend. If you close yourself off to new people, and don't open your heart to them, you'll avoid pain … but also lose out on meeting some incredible people, who will be there during the toughest times of yourlife and create some of the best times of your life. You will fail many times but if you allow that to stop you from trying, you will miss out on the amazing feeling of success once you reach new heights with your accomplishments. Failure is a stepping stone to success. Life Isn't a Competition You will meet many people who will try to outdo you, in school, in college, at work. They'll try to have nicer cars, bigger houses, nicer clothes, cooler gadgets. To them, life is a competition — they have to do better than their peers to be happy. Here's a secret ife isn't a competition. It's a journey. If you spend that journey always trying to impress others, to outdo others, you’re wasting your journey.Instead, learn to enjoy the journey. Make it a journey of Happiness, of constant learning, of continual improvement, of love. Don't worry about having a nicer car or house or anything material, or even a better-paying job.None of that matters a whit, and none of it will make you happier. You'll acquire these things and then only want more. Instead, learn to be satisfied with having enough — and then use the time you would have wasted trying to earn money to buy those things … use that time doing things you love. Find your passion,and pursue it doggedly. Don't settle for a job that pays the bills. Life is too short to waste on a job you hate. Love Should Be Your Rule If there's a single word you should live your life by, it should be this: Love. It might sound corny, I know … but trust me, there's no better rule in life. Some would live by the rule of success. Their lives will be stressful, unhappy and shallow. Others would live by the rule of selfishness — putting their needs above those of others. They will live lonely lives, and will also be unhappy. Still others will live by the rule of righteousness — trying to show the right path, and admonishing anyone who doesn't live by that path. They are concerned with others, but in a negative way, and in the end will only have their own righteousness to live with, and that's a horrible companion. Live your life by the rule of love. Love your spouse, your children, your parents, your friends,with all of your heart. Give to them what they need, and show them not cruelty nor disapproval nor coldness nor disappointment, but only love. Open your soul to them. Love not only your loved ones, but your neighbors … your coworkers … strangers … your brothers and sisters in humanity. Offer anyone you meet a smile, a kind word, a kind gesture, a helping hand. Love not only neighbors and strangers … but your enemy. The person who is cruelest to you,who has been unkind to you … love him. He is a tortured soul, and most in need of your love. And most of all,love yourself. While others may criticize you, learn not to be so hard on yourself, to think that you’re ugly or dumb or unworthy of love … but to think instead that you are a wonderful human being, worthy of Happiness and love …and learn to love yourself for who you are. Finally, know that I love you and always will. You are starting out on a weird, scary, daunting, but ultimately incredibly wonderful journey, and I will be there for you when I can. Godspeed. Love, Your Dad | 
发表于 2014-2-5 08:50:01
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